I look at hentai.

I'll start off by clarifying I'm a male.

- Loud noises annoy/scares me. Loud thunders definitely scares me. Motorbikes with loud, long noise annoys me and scares me.

- I took a test and it says I am 69% feminine (This doesn't mean I'm gay or I hold cups with two fingers not touching the cup or whatever).

- I don't like to watch horror/gory movies/stuff.

I don't think that is all but it is what I can remember at the top of my head...

When I was in Middle School, I wasn't always Mr. Fart-King... I was even fanousplaying Telephone Jokes on People for a while, thus for Teachers.
I remember my very first victim, a turkish family whose youngest kid was always going wild screaming-yelling at me everytime I burped, swore or tell any f%$#in' shit to him. Honestly I always laughed my ass out everytime this kid went nuts screaming and swearing at me when I kept calling at least 5 times in a row. That was so funny, I couldn't stop laughing... And sometimes I even got his big Brother on the Strip.
[b]AND the thing was, when I told my friend about that number I usually dialed, he told me,"If you called that number all the time, than you called Fuat Yamon." Icouldn't believe what I just heard,... it was somebody, my friend knows very well and somebody who was one grade higher than me. We laughed our asses out, and I kept calling Fuat's Family for a while...

... a few weeks later, I did something veeeery stupid. I met Fuat, the Guy whose family I telephone-terrorized for a lot of weeks in front of the music room, I was just asking for fun, "Hey, Fuat, is somebody always calling you?" And he replied,"Yes,....Hey,... hey, was it u??" Oh, oh... He knew right after the moment I asked that it was me, I couldn't deny it,... silly me, how could I ask such a silly question. I walked away very fast but he caught me up, and he was threatening me to apologize, and I was sooo scared at that time, since the guy was a year older and stronger than me... We had a very long talk over this, and I apologized many, many times fearing for my Skin. I didn't wanna get in trouble with this guy.

I hate weaklings, and yet I'm one... =P

Maxi-Ryu99

It's actually no little Secret, but I loved to fart in my School days from 6th to 8th Grade from time to time, maybe even on 9th Grade sometimes.

I have load full of farts stories, if you like to hear them ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ My Secret Technique is... Your stomach has to be as empty as possible. Then you have to swallow a lot of Air in small portions, 5 Times per 10 seconds, and even if you have to burp, keep it down until the swallowed Air reaches further down to your ass. Drag and hold your Air as long as you can inside yourself. The longer you keep the Air in, the more powerful and Longer you have to fart,... and more often ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ ^-^
It hurts my stomach from time to time, if you Ab-use the Air-swallow-Technique too much... Once I ate a load full of food, then I swallowed Air and had to puke...

My cousin was a real master of that techinique. His record was really nice, like 80 farts or something like that.

Franky

Maxi-Ryu99

It's actually no little Secret, but I loved to fart in my School days from 6th to 8th Grade from time to time, maybe even on 9th Grade sometimes.

I have load full of farts stories, if you like to hear them ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ My Secret Technique is... Your stomach has to be as empty as possible. Then you have to swallow a lot of Air in small portions, 5 Times per 10 seconds, and even if you have to burp, keep it down until the swallowed Air reaches further down to your ass. Drag and hold your Air as long as you can inside yourself. The longer you keep the Air in, the more powerful and Longer you have to fart,... and more often ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ ^-^ ^-^
It hurts my stomach from time to time, if you Ab-use the Air-swallow-Technique too much... Once I ate a load full of food, then I swallowed Air and had to puke...

My cousin was a real master of that techinique. His record was really nice, like 80 farts or something like that.

OMG, So I'm not the only Fart Champion here, hahaaaa. That reminds me of the day where I wanted to show some Turkish Soccerboys how to fart every minute. I posted that incident already... <it was really funny that day. Those guys admired me.... and one week later one of'em learned that technique of mine... He told his friend..."Hey, I met this guy last month. He can fart every minute. Hey, Francis. Do you knw what,... I can do that too now..."^-^-^-^-^-^

how to fart any minute lol, that would be hell hilarious >.<

I can out belch my male cousins and im a girl<_> in teh 2nd grade me and my friends were having a bleching contest and im like ok let me go drink some water from the water fountain i come back and i belch so loud the 5 other classes hear me and all my friends were like just amazed my friend shelby just busted up laughing cuz i made the boys in class speechless another secret of mine is that i like shonen-ai and seeing 2 boys kiss turns me on that and plus i beat up a girl in the 5th grade over a boy i beat her good too i pulled out lots of her hair and i even bit and clawed her and kicked her,hehe also i mooned everyone on the playground in the 1st grade<_>

Yeah I was also a terrible Firework Joke playa once...Once, in 7th Grade in Wintertime, I used to play bad Firework Jokes in several Stores: Bakery Store, Flower Store even the Christmas Market or a Parfum shop was a victimized place...

Anyhow every School break we went to the city stores near our School. My freinds and I had some small fire works with us,... Fire Bees. I volunteered first and my fiend helped me fusing the Fire Bee, then I threw it into the bakery as unnoticed as possible and my guyz ran away, except me... I "walked" away,... because if people see me running they might notice that it was me who did it... so I heard all the noise from the FireBee flying around... and then I went back to take a look and actually by two bread buns... I saw one of the sellers yelling"Damnit IF I ever get those kids who did it!!"
Fortunately for me, nobody was suspicious about me... Later on in lesson again, a fellow of mine who was with me he told everybody: "Man, Francis is soo stupid, he set on the fireworks and minutes later he walks in and buys two bread Buns... Is he Stupid?"
I didn't know why my guyz were complaining, nobody arrested me or was suspicious about me...

Nasty Firework Stories part2:

-It was ChristmasTime. Me and my friends walked along the Christmas market with some small Fireworks secretly hidden. We discovered a Sausage stand in front of us; nobody was inside it, and I decided to throw one B1-Firework into it... So my friend held the fuse for me again and I ignited the B1 and threw into the Sausage stand. and it boomed all the way, the sausages flew into the air... One of my fellows was kinda complaining about me and my behavior and told it to almost all the classmates, "Did you know what just hapened. francis threw the Firework into the Sausage Stand and all the sausages flew into the air...

-I once went by a Flower store and had a Bee-Firework ignited. I threw it in and watched it fly all the way random through the store. One of the workers bowed very low and the Fire Bee flew several times through his Legs over his bowed ass and back again ^-^-^-^-^-^

-I went to my Town for break yet again with my friend,... this time I threw a Bug Firework into a Parfume store, and ran away,... I didn't see what happened, but one of the elder Graders told me and my best friend," A woman dropped a Parfume bottle and it cracked, they're calling the police to investigate!" I was shocked at first and feared of being caught... but nothing actually happened to me and to the ones who were with me... Lucky for me...

I used to pee in the closet when i was small, i was to lazy to go to the bathroom XD

OK you guys wanna hear a story, here is one. I sheared this one with a lot of my friends.

When I was visiting in Kugysztan three years ago, we stayed in a town, that is around a lake in the mountines. One day I got stomach pain, which is normal for me because I have gostritas. So, my dad asked one of the people who lived there to give me something from my stomach pain. That person was our host. He walked outside the gate found some (I think random) plant. Boiled it and made me drink it. My stomach pain didn't go away it ended up going away on its own. But threee hours later I felt a funny feeling in my stomach, the kind that felt like I couldn't hold my shit in. 6 seconds after it I realised I had to shit real bad and it was only hard to hold it in but very painful. Now this is asia, so the tualet is outside and I am on the second flor.
I start to run as fast as I possibly can out of my room and down the stairs. I am already starting to get ready to pull my pants down, when I run up to the bathroom (which is just a hall in the ground) there is some laddy helping her kid to take a shit. Amberasing right? But I was in too much pain and I had to shit NOW. So I curse turn around and start runing back, and I see a dark corner where I shouldn't but I must take a shit. SO I do and good I did because I could not hold it in another second. Infact as I pulled my pants down I already started to shit. After I was done thankfuly there was a water hose that I used to wash my ass and try to clean up the Pooh of the cement. Two hours later I get that same exact 6 second warning. But this time I know what it is. I safetly make it to the tualet without shiting my pants.


And here is another shiting story, this one makes me laugh all the time:

2 years ago I was in a Spanish class. And we had a feeled trip to a Mexican restaurant. And once again I got a stomach pain because of my gastritas. I went to the bathroom and I had diaria and it stunk like hell it smelled so horroble. And right after I take a shit my two friends walk in and they like; "Aaaaaa WTF it stinks in here!"" I reaslised who they were, so I decided to joke with them so I made a big furting noise with my mouth. They started to laugh so hard and once they started to lough I began too. I laughed so hard I couldn't brith. They barely could ask WHo is in there? and I barely awnsered it was simple ME. And we laughed none stop for like 5 minutes, I almost died cause of not inough air. It was a litle amberasing to walk back to the table where were sited.

Well those are my two funy litle storys, I hope you enjoyed them.

Gat: I laughed my ass out about all your shitting stories...

dreamcomestrue

how to fart any minute lol, that would be hell hilarious >.<

Well you have to be gifted with that talent ^-^-^-^-^ in the first place. And just do what is already mentioned by me. Swallow Air in fair portions on an empty stomach and keep all the burps down, which is very hard to do. you risk to puke especially when you ate too much, which happened to me once. I ate too much and still I was goiing to train on my Farting technique....
Well you have to contain all coming farts into a big one and just go for it, and keep on swallowing air until you are tired of it...^-^-^

Hmmm...a dirty little secret huh? Hmmm...it has to be clean too...hmmm...YES! I got one. It's very nasty to say but, I pick my nose when nobody is looking or in the bathroom. And another one is that when I see

SPOILER (click to view)

a girl with a skirt, I kinda get fuzzy trying to look when they are sitting down. I don't try too hard or think about doing it a lot, but when I'm bored or something. Now these days, it's kinda harder because girls know how to cover by either putting shorts on or crossing their legs to the point I can't see anything.

That's my dirty secret, but girls, don't think of me as a "hentai".

This Fart Story was actually in the Golf Club:

I am a member of the Colf Club in Castrop Rauxel, and in my past days,... in one of those days, i sat together with some friends, I was about 12 years old,... or maybe 14. We had new members in the Golf Club, and one of'em sat beside us while we ate. He was a few years older than me... I let out a silent fart and giggled... after a while I spoke to this new member, I asked him,"Hey, Thomas, do you smell something?" And heturned around and smelled my fart and went totally insane like,"Waaaaaaaaah, damnit, somebody has blown a nasty one!!" He hid his nose under the shirt for several minutes, and all my other fellows started to laugh out very hard,.. especially me.
And after a while I asked him,"Damnit who could have done it?" And he yelled"YOU!"... I found that so funny and I couldn't forget how he got mad at the fart. So from that day on I wanted to tease him. Everytime, I met him I would ask him,"Thomas, do you smell something?"^-^ ^-^ ^-^... I did it many times until he got mad at me, and one of these days, he kinda confronted me seriously. I was kinda scared, and so he offered me to quit joking around with him, and in return he would be friends with me. I agreed so I never asked him that question ever again. from that day on our relationship was good...

"Thomas, do you smell something??"^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^

I have this feeling where the govenment wired my entire house and that there's a camcorder stuck in my mirror so i hav no privacy. And that me and my sister both encounterd the same ghost that lurks in my room. No joke i swear...but then...it's up to you to believe me. o_O