When you were a kid. One of the greatest things was being
able to do things first. Being trusted by your parents to
do something on your own was definitely a big deal! Whew!
Like being left on your own in the house. No babysitter.
Being able to go to a party or an outing with your
friends...being able to tell them what time you'll be back
without having to bargain about the time. Why? Mainly
because they trust you. Because at the back of their heads
they know that they just have to because its time and they
won't always be there to tell you what to do. Somehow most
people think that I'm this sweet child...hhehee If they
only knew. Nobody really is. We all have our own darkside.
The thing is I've been more likely to play by the rules
than disobey them. Did I regret this? Sometimes.
I think this idealic perception makes me the go to person
for stuff...
Just now I've been told a lot of problems about children.
(I don't have kids...and yet I'm starting to feel like a
parent) Crap! I feel way in over my head right now./(oOo)# Am I
capable? What if I screw the problem up even more. Just
like my other cousin. Sometimes I think people
overestimate my capabilities of talking to my
siblings...or my cousins. Maybe I'm concentrating on the
outcome being perfect. Of course it won't always be like
that. All I can really do...is be me and do my best. Maybe
that's what's expected of me. I'm becoming overly
calculated and precarious again. Us human beings are
notorious for being unpredictable maybe that's what I'm
really afraid of. Guess the upside is we're never boring
that way.
(Back to the part where I'm whining... )

I guess being the go to person can be annoying sometimes
but if you look at it closely...people think I'm a go to
person because I can be trusted and people do think I'll
be able to do something.

So to the people who're planning
to have kids because they think its really cute, because
its the next step to marriage or its to punish
somebody.. Think again. Remember the moment you decide to
have kids is the moment you decide to screw-up somebody
else’s life...not just your just your own…